Sunday, November 25, 2007

Yes, Zeb, we all know I have too much time on my hands...

I used to know a guy. He told me a story about something that had happened to him years before we met.

He was driving home from college, a surprise visit to his mother and stepfather. A few miles from the house, he was involved in a car accident. One car trying to pass another with another car coming from the other direction (his car). One car ended up in the ditch, overturned. He stopped his car and ran to the car in the ditch. Where he saw his mother, badly injured, and his stepfather, dead.

While I was visiting my chakra person last week, something came up, in a therapy kind of way. Something from the dark years, those spent with Stepfather1, or Bluebeard, as I think of him. It wasn't an unknown thing or terribly traumatizing thing. It was more like a sad thing. And I was surprised because it didn't look like what I had remembered it looking like. Does that make sense?

Anyway. I can see you're wondering where I'm going with these completely unrelated paragraphs.

Well, it's about my question of the day: What do you do with the stuff you can't live with?

And I'm not talking about surviving or whatever, because we all obviously do that. And to those of you who actually process and move on, who are you and how do you do that?

I'm talking about those things that you can't live with but you can't take away because they're there and they've become the blocks upon which your self has been built.

I myself use a lovely deep purple velvet covered suitcase. I like the suitcase very much and the color is dreamy. What I do not like is that items I had carefully put in said suitcase did not look the same when taken out. Improper packing causes wrinkles. In time.


beth said...

I also remember stepfather1 - and I remember you and your middle brothers feelings for him. Maybe I need to buy a blue velvet suitcase (I like that idea) but the suitcase would have to come in extra large - I have too much stuff - just too much stuff that I do my best just not to talk or think about. . .unfortunatley, try and I might, they are built in me because I have major insecurities because of them.

zeb said...

Amen-check email

Anonymous said...

Have you seen the Darjeeling limited? Great movie, needed some editing, but great. These brothers traveling around India trying to force a mystical experience to bring them closer again and all the while carrying piles and piles of beautiful expensive baggage. The last scene they are running for the train and throwing the bags to the ground so they can jump on, with big smiles on their faces.