Wednesday, November 29, 2006

What's up with that?

I left the United States 9 years ago. That's a long time in some ways and a very short time in others. Regardless. In that time, some things have changed for the better and some for the worse. Television has gotten both better and worse, and I know you know exactly what I mean. The country has had to live through what will some day be referred to as the Very Bad W Bush Years. (You're free to disagree with me but I don't want to hear about it. I've very closed-minded that way.) You can get a soy mocha at just about any coffee shop, even in a small city in the midwest. No comments about the midwest, please, I'm from there. But feel free to comment about soy milk if you feel like it. I'm very open-minded that way.

Anyway, telephone lines have clearly taken a turn for the worse. I have 3 friends, and you know who you are, who have the most evil phone system ever. I suppose it's great for you to be able to filter out the riff-raff, the telemarketers, the scammers, the stalkers and the prank callers. But take it from me, being on the other end of it totally bites.

I called one of you last week. The evil phone voice told me I was not recognized by the system. Then EPV told me I needed to enter a code, but you can't do that from overseas. Then EPV told me to press 2 if I wanted to try to get through the acceptance process anyway. I said my name after the beep. EPV announced my name several times. But I was not accepted. You, my friend, were not home. But instead of letting me leave a message like any other CIVILIZED phone voice, EPV told me to get lost. She used more polite words than those, but the message conveyed was definitely get lost. Of course, I was charged international phone rates for this abuse and I didn't even get to leave a message. You didn't even know I called and was thinking about you.

Progress, schmogress.

10 comments:

charlie said...

What absolute rotters! Don't contact those three so-called friends again and strike them off the Christmas list, and the next time THEY try to call you, just say pft!

That's my advice and it's sage stuff, believe me

Lorraine said...

It wasn't me, I swear.

beth said...

I do not have EPV and would love to hear from you.
Other than that, I have yet to try a soy mocha - maybe I'll try one today since there are about 7 coffee shops in my town - only one starbucks though - because my little town much prefers small operations.

Grish said...

I don`t even answer the house phone anymore or have an answering machine hooked up to it for that matter. I prefer my cell phone for everything now-a-days, everythings built in...

The National Security Agency said...

Our bad. Please go about your business.

Grish said...

LMAO

charlie said...

she's done another one. the dam is burst. and the damn is burst too.

zeb said...

Happy Birthday

Nicole said...

CBW1 - Oui, c'est ca.

Lorraine and Beth - You both have very civilized phone systems.

Grish - Don't even get me started on cell phones. Costs me a FORTUNE to call them from here.

NSA - I think I still have one or two civil liberties you haven't violated yet. Any idea how long that's going to take?

CBW2 - Oui, c'est ca.

Zeb - See today's post.

Grish said...

I didn`t know that about international calls and cell phones...