So read ahead with serious caution. Mom, don't read this post at all. You won't like it. I mean it.
I have a real flair for saying inappropriate things sometimes. Always in social situations where I'd be much better off keeping my mouth shut. But somehow, it never seems to work out that way. I'm a total lightweight. All it takes is one glass of wine and I'll start saying things I ought to keep to myself. This is especially true in France where I haven't really mastered the whole scene, or much of anything for that matter. My other problem is that I take no notice of audience. Rookie mistake. In our mid-30's we're still rookies, right?
So here goes. Here's my lastest, but not greatest, gaffe (blunder).
Husband and I were at a dinner. Hosted by some friends of friends of ours. Knowing how our friends are, I actually thought I did know the audience, but apparently not. Anyway. There were 12 of us. I was acquainted with 3 of the other couples, their kids are at the same school as Boy1 was this year. The other couple are good friends.
The wine flowed. The conversation was interesting at times and not at others. At one point, my former vegetarianism was mentioned. The French tend to be fascinated by anything that eliminates whole food groups from one's diet. They just don't get it. But that's a whole other post. So, many made many jests thoughout the dinner about vegetarians. It was in good fun. But it was getting a little redundant.
The host was talking about his new office space. And his new secretary. And the window though which everyone walking by can see his spiffy office space and pretty secretary. He was kidding when he said, she's great, but I think she's a vegetarian.
And just like that. Out of (seemingly) nowhere I said, "I suppose by that you mean she won't swallow?"
Husband and G and P, our good friends, cracked up. Hard. From everyone else there was total silence for about 10 seconds. Then all the husbands started laughing. And the wives just looked at me strangley. Husband (he's so sweet) said to the host, "You know, you pretty much asked for it."
P said, "You've got to watch it with Nicole. You just never know."
I know, I know, I'm not doing much for our image over here, am I?