That which you spent years, decades, building from the outside falls away; you remember that concrete is made of sand. Another consequence of no longer running from water. The water runs you instead, it has sought out the hidden places and made its quiet path to the deep down darkness. Without you even knowing it, it has dissolved the structure from the inside, all your engineering prowess now muddy depths you must walk through.
Like the first time things shattered, you did not see this coming. You dress up for the ballet and end up in a mosh pit. And while - obviously - some part of you must have wanted this, your own sneakiness comes as a surprise. Again.
What you always worked so hard to have, to be, those are now only ideas of what might be. And what has been left behind, a trace of what never was.